The Goodness (and Evilness) of God

I ended up having to work late hours one weeknight. As a result, I overslept and my children missed the school bus (again). So, I had to take them to school (again) myself and then head on to work.

As I was returning to my car from signing the "tardy" sheet for my kids, I see another parent ambling along with his child into the school building.

Well, at least I'm not the only parent oversleeping.

I found myself staring at this guy as he was making his way down the sidewalk. But, I didn't know why. I felt like I was being rude, but couldn't help myself. And even stranger, this guy was staring right back at me. But the more I stared, the more familiar he looked. Then, in the tone of a question, he called out my name.

Suddenly, I remember who he was and we both became so excited to see each other. I decided to hang around my car until he came back out. We talked for over an hour! We hadn't seen each other in probably twenty years! We tried to catch up up on each other's life-- which explains why we talked for so long.

This poor fellow seems to have had a lot of hardship in his travels. I am not envious of him at all.

We met in a Christian youth group when we were kids, so I had to sort of keep my guard up. He still used Christian "language"-- now and then he hinted that he was still trying to grow his relationship with God and such. But he openly admitted that the evangelical persona that he projected years ago wasn't really him.

He was also quick to admit that he was quite baffled at how a person can endure hardships and suffering still make sense of the Bible after actually reading through it.

He seems to be where I was a years ago just before I abandoned my faith. He's reading his Bible-- I mean, really reading it and paying attention to the words. And as a result, he's noticed that God doesn't shy away from taking credit for creating evil, and perhaps even causing it.

Not many Christians that I know of will even let their mouths form such words!

He cited how King Saul was vexed by a spirit that God sent. He talked about how God admits to even creating evil. He talked about how he doesn't see things any longer as "good" verses "evil" and God verses Satan. Rather, he simply sees God causing everything to happen for what ever reason that he sees fit. Sort of like the way God treated Job by openly allowing Satan give him one helluva time.

Then oddly, my old friend concede that God must know what he's doing.

But curiously, he would often hedge his praise towards God with the phrase, ". . . I guess" throughout our conversation. Such as-- "God must know what he's doing . . . I guess".

He seemed hesitant and doubtful about mainstream Christianity now with his newfound insight flooding in interesting implications.

But despite the vibe I was feeling from him, I wasn't sure if he was ready for me to be totally honest and open about my current atheistic perspective.

So, I played along for the moment.

We exchanged numbers. I think we'll talk again soon (if I can find the slip of paper. I'm an idiot! I should have put it in my phone on the spot).

The evolution of his religious beliefs will be interesting to observe should we keep in touch. And should I ever revel to him my current beliefs, his reaction would be quite interesting to witness as well.

Happy Atheist Day!

Happy Atheist Day, everyone!

I think this is my third year posting a "holiday greeting" such as this.

Three years is a long time in "internet" years.

Anyhow, Happy Atheist Day!

Enjoy!

The Arms of Jesus

Both of my kids participate in the my local county soccer association. This results in my sometimes mingling with other soccer parents that I'd probably never meet otherwise.

One parent happened to be a semi-pro soccer player himself and (to me) seemed quite fit and active. His son looked like he may very well be on the same path to becoming quite adept with a soccer ball.

This gentleman that I just described recently experienced a serious heart condition that was obviously lurking for some time; however, it's manifestation was sudden and surprising. He ended up staying in the hospital for weeks.

I finally saw him at one of the games recently. I didn't recognize anything about him except his voice. He was frail and he couldn't walk due to atrophy, so he was going to watch the game from the passenger side of the parked, family van. He called my name as I was making my way out to the field to watch my son play; I was unwittingly passing by where he sat.

He talked about how he was totally caught off guard by his turn in health. He talked about all the tubes he endured-- even feeding tubes-- and all the lost weight. He talked about his sense of helplessness and his newfound dependency upon others for simple things such as getting a decent shave.

He strongly alluded to also having a near death experience. He described how he had a feeling that he was leaving this world when his heart condition finally came to the surface so suddenly.

He began to cry as he continued to describe how he thought he was going to die, but then he seemed to be in a warm place. He felt as though he was wrapped in an electric blanket. He became calm and felt safe.

He said that he didn't want to leave because he realized he was in the arms of Jesus.

I never had a near death experience, but I suspect that I'm slightly familiar with the feelings he described because of my exposure to Pentecostalism. I remember many such warm feelings during worship and praise. I have known moments of ecstasy where I totally lost my sense of where I was. I think I could identify with some of the feelings he described.

But, then he spoke of how he saw his wife and children. He thought of them and realized that he couldn't leave them. So, he chose to come back despite the beaconing warmth of Jesus' arms.

He was still crying as he talked. But, I became curious. Was he crying because he was so overjoyed to have felt the arms of Jesus, or was he crying because he almost died and could only barely hold on to life because he didn't want to abandon his family?

I wondered this because he spoke of the fear of never seeing his family again with a sense of agony. He talked about how his children have reacted to his being gone from home for so long. I do think he was very afraid-- but I cannot know his deepest thoughts.

He admonished me to trust in Jesus because now he's certain that he's real. He already assumes I'm a Christian-- and he already believed in Christ. But, he just couldn't help but be sure to mention how real Jesus has become to him now that he's had such an experience.

I was very much like that after I had spoken in tongues for the first time. I remember it quite well.

His appeal was emotional and certainly compelling. But, I also know that such feelings can come from totally within ourselves.

I didn't debate him. That was not the time for such a conversation. I'm just glad he survived his life-threatening aliments and remained in the land of the living.

But, I'm still not convinced his tears were of joy for being in the arms of Jesus. I believe he was simply afraid for it all to end so suddenly-- without any warning.

Again, I cannot know how he truly felt. I can only speculate and impose my own bias thinking upon his words.

Besides-- even if he did cry because of fear (and not joy), I certainly cannot say that I blame him for his tears. I'd probably cry just the same.

Prayer Duds

Recently, my wife went to a series of group therapy sessions for people dealing with clinical depression. She's battled this for some time now. And boy, depression is a battle. Depression is a very serious disorder that should not be taken lightly at all.

In her group session, she mentioned how all the prayer in the world never helped. No matter how much she prayed, no matter how much others prayed for her, she never saw results with her depression-- apart from taking medication, attending therapy, and having a supportive social base.

The therapy session took place at a semi-religious institution. I mean-- I'm in Jesusland, for cryin' out loud! Where will we find a secular therapist?

And many of the people in her group were admitted Christians. But my wife says that everyone in her group emphatically nodded in agreement to her statement.

They all had that common experience that when it comes to depression-- prayer seems to only be a dud.

Why is that?

Maybe for the same reason that God doesn't heal amputees, perhaps.

No, This is About Power

Ever since Pope Benedict XVI gave his September 2010 speech in Europe, his words about atheism have been on my mind. Particularly these words here:

Even in our own lifetime, we can recall how Britain and her leaders stood against a Nazi tyranny that wished to eradicate God from society and denied our common humanity to many, especially the Jews, who were thought unfit to live. I also recall the regime’s attitude to Christian pastors and religious who spoke the truth in love, opposed the Nazis and paid for that opposition with their lives. As we reflect on the sobering lessons of the atheist extremism of the twentieth century, let us never forget how the exclusion of God, religion and virtue from public life leads ultimately to a truncated vision of man and of society and thus to a “reductive vision of the person and his destiny”

I've seen plenty of arguments for and against this notion. And I've personally been in a few on-line arguments with other people over this issue.

I hope that when I share my opinion here, that I don't come across sounding as though I'm completely "right" and any opposing viewpoint is completely "wrong". Rather, I hope that my opinion can at least be thought provoking or perhaps even stir up a meaningful dialog on the subject matter.

And, my opinion may very well be met with silence. That's OK, too. I feel the need to get this off my chest at the very least. Writing helps me to do that-- even if no one comments or even reads this post.

Let us assume that Hitler was unquestionably an atheist and that the Nazi regime was undeniably--without debate-- the result of an atheistic philosophy and world view though and through.

Even with such an assumption, can we still not think of other large scale crimes against society that were committed in the name of God?

And can we still not see that many people who subscribe to the wold view of atheism can still do good and make great contributions to society?

I have slowly come to the opinion that arguing the level of religiosity found in either Hitler or the Nazi regime alone cannot completely help us learn the dire lessons that we need to grasp from history.

I personally think that it's clear that Nazism was not about atheism-- not when the belt buckles of some soldiers would read: Gott Mit Uns.

Nazism was not about atheism when religious imagery was mix in quite well with the propaganda of the Nazi party.

But, I'll dare say that Nazism was not necessarily about theism, either.

No, in my opinion, this is about power.

Anyone that wants to control how you think, how you live, who you consider your enemies, who you worship, and who you may not worship is only seeking power. A person seeking absolute power can come heralding the name of Christ or come denying the existence of God. And followers of either ideology can find themselves mindlessly supporting such a wantonness drive for human control.

I admire the Founding Fathers of the United States of America. They tried to fashion a government that allowed belief in God without imposing religion upon anyone. After fleeing from a monarchy, they understood well that mindlessly following any ideology is the truest danger of society. We need to be free to argue, disagree, live our own lives, and state opinions that are unpopular. We need to learn to do this and still respect each other's humanity and refrain from resorting to violence to resolve ideological disputes.

When force is used to impose an ideology on others, then the moral tenants of the ideology in question are probably only an afterthought.

Because in the end, it's all really about power.